EXTRAORDINARY EFFECT

Brief Summary
Leaders have long been searching for the key to helping others achieve excellence and realize their potential. What if we could transform those under our influence and ignite the fires of motivation? What if the people we lead found great purpose in what they do and put their whole hearts into their work? Nor
Don't we hope to nurture genuine motivation so that the individuals we lead become better employees?
New discoveries in brain science and Dr. Insights from top CEOs interviewed by Tim Irwin for Extraordinary Impact offer exciting new answers. Irwin says that in most organizations, the methods used to provide feedback to employees, such as performance appraisal or multi-rater feedback, are appropriate to the task.
reveals that it is not. Top CEOs confirm that these methods tend to exploit a natural “negativity bias” that is ingrained in all of us.
Instead, in recent years, science has revealed that affirmation stimulates major positive changes in the brain. It releases certain neurochemicals associated with well-being and higher performance. Driven by this discovery, Extraordinary Impact aligns employees with an organization's mission, strategy, and goals.
It offers an interesting new approach to bring

What You Will Learn in This Brief Summary
• Research showing that affirmation works better than constructive criticism.
• How to use Words of Life to strengthen people's core.
• What Alliance Feedback means and how to use it most effectively.
• Motivating high potential people and reshaping performance feedback.

CHAPTER 1: THE SCIENCE OF EXTRAORDINARY EFFECT
Many Leaders Create an Effect They Didn't Intended
The age-old question for every organization is: How do we bring out the best in the people we are responsible for leading? How do we get them to care? How do we ensure productivity, quality, punctuality and excellent attention to customers? How do we help them love their jobs? The answers to these questions vary among different employees.
appears to vary greatly. How we motivate a person or group to do something and do it well is a mystery. It's surprising how often we resort to the default position of a negative consequence for something not done, as opposed to an approach that actually results in a better employee and a better person.
We gain a remarkable ability to transform others when we affirm them, as opposed to when we apply what might euphemistically be called “constructive criticism.” Here are some phrases we routinely hear from the task-oriented leadership genre.
•"I need to light a fire under it." — A phrase originally used to motivate chimney sweeps who were afraid of climbing up a tall chimney.
•"I will hold you accountable." —The word responsible actually comes from Arabic and means "the person to whom questions are asked". The underlying meaning is a thinly veiled threat that actually means, "You'd better do what I say."

The inherent belief reflected in these sayings is: “I will force you to do something that you are essentially resistant to doing.” These; It suggests that workers, students, actors or children are lazy, irresponsible, lack ambition and are less intelligent and therefore require constant inspection to ensure the job is completed. “That was a bit harsh,” we might say. Yes, but in our drive to get results from the people we manage, teach, parent or coach we can adopt methods that appeal to our core need to control results. A growing body of research now shows that for a leader to be effective, he must rely on both task-oriented management and
It shows that it is vital that we spend time and energy on a framework that values the emotional and relational dimensions of the people we lead. Here's the rub: New research on the brain argues that many of the things we do to motivate others accomplish the exact opposite of our goal. Mistakenly
We appeal to the wrong part of the brain and short-circuit the impact we might want to have.
What if we could get people to work wholeheartedly? As leaders, parents or teachers, what we want is to transform the attitudes, work habits and passion of those we influence; to push them to accomplish the task before them with a sense of commitment and energy.

New Brain Research Explains How We Reveal the Jewel in Others
Why do we want affirmation? Of course it feels good, but why? Aristotle observed that every person is motivated by a telos, or purpose, in his or her life. In essence, we want to know that we are giving everything we have to pursue high and noble outcomes and realize a deep sense of significance in our lives. of our lives,
We look for validation that it actually has value for something bigger than tackling traffic congestion.

Why is it important to be conscious?
Your organization is shaped by the hidden emotions and fears, desires and needs, motivations and ambitions of each employee, and certainly yours. Hidden motivations and hidden agendas are ticking time bombs that threaten success. The only antidote is to “make the unconscious conscious.” This is how we transform our rational selves
We strengthen. By knowing the whole story about ourselves and the people we interact with.
Because we have become too focused on behavior in our approach to problems, we have become increasingly action-oriented, less reflective and therefore less understanding. As a leader, you must be alert to take action to take action – ignite first and ask questions later. Such actions are the result of faulty logic and bad
leads to decisions. The rational mind, both individual and corporate, can only be strengthened by dealing with unconscious problems, pretending they do not exist.
Without reflection and introspection, irrationality remains buried under the rug and grows stronger every day. Consciousness requires you to be fully alert, remain fully alert, and alert to non-conscious business practices. The conscious and unconscious elements of a situation and the motivations of everyone involved, including yourself
It is the job of the conscious leader to take the time to understand, to ask appropriate questions to the right people, to think, and to be comfortable with not knowing what, if anything, to decide.
The right kind of affirmation satisfies this compelling need. Deep affirmation reaches our core and affirms the person we want to be. While it can be very satisfying to know that deep down we are pursuing purpose, perhaps the most powerful personal affirmation occurs when someone else acknowledges the strength of our character.
Certain beliefs are formed when someone important affirms us in a particularly profound way. These beliefs are stored in our core, that person who lives inside us and thinks, feels, forms opinions and silently speaks to us. Beliefs guide our actions as opportunities and situations materialize. Affirmation from others we respect,
It creates beliefs in our core that guide our actions. Our brains benefit significantly from affirmation. They glow with electrical activity. We feel more optimistic and work more productively. Criticism, on the other hand, activates different parts of the brain that metaphorically drag us into darkness. Brain research points to the following characteristics of affirmation:

• Eliminates stress and improves higher cognitive thinking and problem solving.
• It positively affects an area of the brain that is the location of subjective value, i.e. eigenvalue. The lower middle prefrontal cortex evaluates how we subjectively feel about ourselves.
• It improves self-control and makes us more productive.
• It makes us happier and more productive.
• Activates the lower middle prefrontal cortex, which is linked to positive behavioral changes.
• It activates affected brain circuits by releasing hormones such as oxytocin and vasopressin, known for their roles in trust and commitment.

• It nurtures innovation and activates brain areas associated with calmness and openness to new ideas. In many organizations, methods used to provide feedback to employees, such as performance appraisal or multi-rater feedback systems, often achieve the opposite of what was intended because recipients stubbornly focus on their deficiencies.
Brain science tells us that these methods tend to exploit a natural negativity bias that is hardwired into all of us. In many ways, it also seems easier to criticize. There are also methods that use brain areas that are naturally better at problem solving and innovation. Great leaders are born in our brains.
They work hard to avoid exploiting the negativity bias that exists as an individual and instead focus their energies on tapping into the brain areas that make us more innovative, better at problem solving, and more resilient. It is absolutely necessary to discuss and compensate for the behavior of followers who are not aligned with the goals we have set.
but we now have undeniable evidence that how we achieve alignment makes a big difference in employee motivation and effectiveness.
Let's agree that positive impact is the outcome we're looking for. If we want to deliver extraordinary impact and bring out the best in those around us, we must master the art of affirmation. We must learn how to affirm individuals, teams, and even an entire organization.

PART II: HOW THE EXTRAORDINARY EFFECT WORKS
Tactical Affirmation: Affirming Style and Competence
Affirmation must be carefully directed to three dimensions of the human mind that make the transformative impact we bring about with other people more effective. Affirmation varies depending on:

1. Habitual style — observable patterns that consistently characterize us. Our style determines how others perceive us and our ideas.

2.Competence — our skills, abilities and knowledge that lie behind effective actions. Our competencies determine what we can do.

3. Core — the person within us, the leader within us. Our core determines who we are, our character. Affirmation of our style and competence belongs to the category of tactical influence. These dimensions are the ground-level, day-to-day, transactional initiatives we use to do our jobs. Leaders use affirmations every day, every week.
Affirming another person's core is strategic influence. The meaning of the word strategic; Its scope is wider, deeper, transformational and inclusive. Strategic influencing changes the people we potentially lead from the person within. Leaders use affirmation less frequently and more opportunistically. Great leaders create a culture of intentional positivity by using the appropriate amount of tactical and strategic affirmation. A healthy and well-functioning organization (or family or team) needs both tactical and strategic influence. We all have our habitual style that defines us in fairly consistent ways that others have come to expect. Our style greatly affects how well we stand out to others.

Most importantly, it determines how others perceive us and our ideas. Our style also encompasses our abilities and skills, our competencies, and determines to a significant extent how effectively these abilities can be used. To affirm the style of those we lead, we must develop a style vocabulary. Like most areas of human behaviour, our habitual style has both a light and a dark side. The four types of style — constructive, defensive, idealistic, and challenging — include traits that tend to suit others and interfere with effectiveness.
For example, a constructive person uses focused action to finish tasks. Positive aspects of the constructor; It involves being practical, organised, focused and logical. Possible negative aspects include lack of interpersonal attention, lack of passion and creativity, and disrespect for people who lack technical skills and logic. Typical affirmations include: “Thank you for your focus on meeting the deadline,” and “Thank you for bringing the discussion back to the real issues.”
Our competencies, such as judgment, have a huge impact on our success in work and life. It is vital to praise the competence of anyone we wish to lead. Several of the CEOs we interviewed talked about how to affirm the work of our subordinates. These recommendations are summarized in the following five guidelines:
1. Appreciate actions for underlying competencies.
2. CEOs recommended affirming achievements but also keeping them in context (not forgetting why it was important at the time).
3. Affirmation must be done in time, that is, in real time.
4. Trust must come before feedback, especially when the feedback is adversarial.
5. Affirmation should come from an authentic place when feedback is given.

When a boss affirms an employee's style or competence, that person's belief in the belief grows: "I am competent.  I can do this." When new or more challenging situations arise, the affirmed individual acts in line with those beliefs.

Strategic Influence: How to Give Words of Life
To truly uncover personal transformation, we must reach the core of a person with Words of Life. Our core has a voice; social scientists sometimes call this self-talk. Whether we are aware of it or not, there is a regular conversation going on within us, and when we learn to pay attention to that voice, we can hear more about ourselves.
The revelations may be informative, if not surprising.
Our core learns, generates ideas, and serves as the main repository of our beliefs. Our beliefs provide an important governing element in our behavior. When our beliefs are firm and true, they lead to effective leadership. When these beliefs are false and we act on those false beliefs, the results can be catastrophic.
Words of Life transform us because they speak the language of the core. They are significantly different from words we might use to affirm someone else's style or competence. Life Quotes transform us and bring out the best in the important people we seek to influence.
The act of affirming someone with the Words of Life plants redemptive beliefs at a person's core, which in turn produce redemptive actions. The word savior here; It means life-saving, liberating, nourishing and transformative. What do the Words of Life have in common? These powerful words; about our character, within us
speaks about the unchangeability of the person. They include traits such as honesty, courage, modesty, judgment, originality, self-regulation, wisdom, candor, resilience, and influence.
For example, a person might praise another person's originality by saying, "Your team really respects and trusts you. I believe this comes from being realistic and honest with them. You don't try to manipulate them with hopeful predictions that are far from reality. Your peers really trust you, too. Everything you tell them is "They believe it's true. Your uniqueness is an important asset and I wish more people were like you." In most cases, leaders tend to affirm an action taken by someone else. A much more powerful step is to affirm the dimension of a person's core that triggers the desired action. How do we best communicate the Words of Life?
• First of all, we must have a solid core.
• We must be original.
• Our words must be carefully considered.
• We must use the right words — Life Words come from the well of character.
• Words of Life are transmitted on a foundation of trust established between the giver and the receiver.
• Life Quotes can be given spontaneously or planned as long as they are thoughtful and sincere.
• Words of Life should be given when the recipient is the sole focus at that moment.

Death Words: Constructive Criticism Is Not Successful. Because Our Brains Are Designed for Better

Even if we have an emotionally tough constitution, our spirit can still be crushed when we are on the receiving end of withering criticism, ridicule, or shame from a significant person such as a parent, coach, teacher, peer, or boss.
When we give a subordinate feedback that doesn't involve concern about his or her personality, we miss the parts of that person's brain that strengthen innovation, problem-solving, creativity, and self-worth. Even worse, we activate the part of the brain that shuts down any positive effects we intended!

Here are some findings from brain research about what happens when we humiliate people with criticism:
• Criticism activates our amygdala, the part of the brain that hosts the “fight or flight” response.
• During criticism, our brains have less access to some of the brain's most positive resources, such as higher-order thinking, self-reflection, creativity, problem-solving, and stress regulation.
• During criticism, the recipient of the criticism absorbs the negative emotions of the critic.
• Abusive supervision; It leads to very negative consequences, such as decreased creativity, productivity and engagement, and increased depression and anxiety.
• When employees do not see criticism as accurate and relevant to them, they become adversarial and fail to see validity even when the feedback is valid.
• There is a domino effect where abusive department leaders create abusive team leaders.
Whether intended or not, the recipient of critical feedback hears that it is about the person they are, not about what they have done. Displeasure and disdain from an important person sends us an important message that we are no good. Criticism lowers our self-worth and our brains react with intense negativity. Happy and productive
The key to employees is the leader's consistently supportive behavior.
Like a family unit, positivity and negativity are often passed down from generation to generation. A negative leader is likely to produce negative leaders under his charge. Negativity is contagious, so it perpetuates negativity among those we have influence over.
Culture significantly influences our leadership behavior. An organizational culture that emphasizes structure, obligation, and punishments for unusual behavior further reduces the creative insight and attention span of our followers.

One of the expressions we hear throughout our lives is "constructive criticism". What this usually means is, "I'm going to destroy you emotionally, but my intentions are positive." But usually there is nothing constructive about it, and telling us this in advance puts us on hyper-alert. The concept of "constructive criticism" should be destroyed.

Alliance Feedback: Experienced CEOs on Helping Others Change

What they know
How do we persuade those we lead to change what they are doing without using negative feedback or criticism when they are off track, ineffective, making mistakes, or not acting in alignment with the organization's mission, goals, or values? Alliance Feedback describes how to align people with their own espoused values and goals and/or their organization's mission, strategy, goals, and values. Alliance Feedback draws supportive attention to conflicts between a person's goals and their current behavior. There are two types of Alliance Feedback.

Aspirational Feedback tends to be focused on an individual's hopes and dreams. “If you do this, you are more likely to achieve your goals.” The key idea here is to make sure we connect what a person wants to achieve with a change they need to make.

Task Feedback is based on a boss and employee's mutual or collective desire to achieve our organization's mission and mutually determined performance goals that they both believe are valuable contributions to the overall business. When an employee moves away from actions that support the mission and goals
This creates an opportunity to draw attention to discrepancies. The most important aspect of a Task Feedback conversation between a boss and a subordinate is the establishment of a connection between the employee's work and the mission and goals that they agree are relevant and important. There are eight conditions to make the above approach effective. this look perspectives will enliven our perspective and form the basis of effective Alliance Feedback:

1. Remember that our amygdala has a constant tendency towards negativity. It is tuned to detect threats. In war zones, enemy combatants sometimes lay trip wires with a clear fishing line attached to a detonator of explosive material. When we want to help someone else grow, we avoid their tripwires and
We aim to make speaking feel safe.
2. Make sure you have the basics, too. We need to put distractions aside and make sure the recipient knows that is their sole focus at that moment. We need to prepare for the conversation and make sure the timing is right for both of us.
3. If we know deep down that a person is on our side, we can hear everything they are communicating to us. One way to avoid activating the defensive side of a person's amygdala is to make sure that person feels safe.
4. Attribute positive intentions to the recipient of Alliance Feedback.
5. A critical aspect of Alliance Feedback is that those we lead are likely to be a barrier to their goals. We want them to become more aware of their actions.
6. Some CEOs have emphasized that feedback should be encouraging and challenging at the same time.
7. The tone of the Alliance Feedback conversation should always be professional and adult.
8. There is a big difference between discussing an action and criticizing a person. Alliance Feedback, small It should be helpful without being degrading.
Extraordinary Impact for Low Performers: Bringing Out the Jewel in Someone Who Has Lost His Way Performance problems often, but not always, stem from a person's ineffective style, lack of competence, or a damaged core, or some combination of the three.